Andrew J. Lederer

1. I have nice eyes,
2. I have a cute nose.
3. My mouth is too small.
3. My tongue is too big and fat, both for my mouth and in general.
4. The bottom part of my face is generally inferior to the top part.
5. My underbite, too-small mouth, and too-fat tongue lead to a reptilian tongue-darting not, apparently, appealing to mammals.
6. My jaw and tongue are unpleasantly reminiscent of someone's grandmother.
7. My posture and general body-type make me look fatter than I am.
8. Goose ham from Harrod's is good.
9. I am not perfect.

It seems I was mistaken about my ability to be air (or air-like) and thus unbeatably comfortable to be around; so comfortable and so like the air (life-sustaining, taken for granted and something through which one can move) that I need not be welcome in an ordinary sense -- simply part of the environment and therefore just right.

In truth, it turns out I have a spiky beard and many positions it is uncomfortable to lean against.

For I am not the air.

Yet this night of planned televiewing became a slumberer's paradise. Because my televiewing partner was as comfortable to be around as I imagine myself to be (but am not).

She was as the air.