Thank God its Friday! "Thanks God.".

I've had quite a good week in summary, and I have a fabulous girls night planned for this evening. Now let me just point out here that I don't do "girls nights out" usually because they make me cringe, as do hen nights. I can't stand this hypocritical thing that women do which is to give it the "Sisters are doing it for themselves" and all that shit, but when push comes to shove alot of them are a bunch of bitches ready to stab their mates in the back as quick as you can say "Hang on, I fancied him first!"

Yes if the truth be known lots of women don't have the TRUE sisterhood vibe that I speak of. I blame Heat Magazine... Always pointing out imperfections of the almost perfect celebs in this world, doesn't promote things like anorexia and all that, more like bitchiness to the extreme. Sending it down the lines to all the gulliable teenage girls out there.... Nope my pals and I have true sister-hood going on - and thus we don't need to go on crazy night's out screeching "I will survive!" at the tops of our voices.

So I arranged this fabulous night out for six of us and out we shall go. We're going out in my (new) manor which is Greenwich and we shall drink and laugh but not screech and sing. We won't do that thing women do, where they pretend to be lesbians so boys might speak to them. I do like women, I DO! Please don't see this as an attack on women its not. Its not. I just get sick of women who don't stick together.

Poor example': 2 years ago I was "seeing" a man for about 4 months. Unbenownst to me, he was simply sleeping with me regularly which isn't the same thing. After a while I started to get a bit bored of being used, having the occassional act of reassurance thrown at me, and thought, "actually, I quite like myself," so wasn't sure of how much more using I could take. We had some cross texts between us - and I was very hurt.

A couple of weeks later, I went to a function and at the function was this strange man who'd been sleeping with me, and there on his arm was a lady who was clearly his girlfriend. I kept my cool for about 6 drinks and then I was very very angry. I went up to the man and I was very angry to him. I was sad too. The lady with him shifted uncomfortably but my beef wasn't with her, it never was, even if she'd known about me, it wasn't her problem, it was all HIS. (this is an act of sister hood) I eventually had to be bundled into a cab by my good pal Pats (another act of sister-hood) and home I went. I never contacted him again.

Many months later it emerged that the lassie with him that night knew who I was, but I didn't know who she was - and through a mutual pal we met up and she divulged that she was the girlfriend at the function with the strange man that had slept with me regularly. We'd had an over lap of about 3 months. But me and her, well, we became firm friends. She is great and he's a COCK.

SO! Tonight should be GREAT! Wooh! I got my shopping from Tesco online and there was lots of wine in the delivery, also bits and bobs to eat. We plan to sufficiently line our tummy's at my flat and then head on out.

The rest of the weekend is pretty busy too. Seeing my parents tomorrow so that I can get rid of the crapola I've had at their house for the last decade. Sunday its mine and Gareth's 1 year anniversery. Yes I can't quite believe it myself cause he's really whiney. Only joking. Or am I? We had an argue today, cause the oysters I ordered to be delivered didn't come which was all HIS fault. "how is it MY fault?" he says.. God. Not really, he a lovely little cat head and we're going to have a day of lovely-ness.

It was my last show at SW1 Radio on wednesday so now I'm setting about making my audio reel so that I can submit it to one and all.

And finally, Catface Cabaret is booked and confirmed for the 4th November for a special gunpowder, treason and plot edition. Pappy's Fun Club, Anthony Davies (of LBC fame), Brian and Kystal, Evie Anderson and Amphlett & Candy will be starring in this show, at the Hen and Chickens in Islington! Get booking!

Have a lovely weekend

Yeah so I had a jolly weekend - starting out at the pub on friday night with some of my pals from work. Later on I suddenly became inexplainably drunk so I decided to hot foot it home to catch the last hour of BB. This was a mistake as it was too late, I'd gone off big bro a while ago and nothing Davina or Brian could say would change that. Suddenly it was the next day (how) and I was waking up in my lovely comfy bed with a lovely mini hang-over.

The plan for today (saturday) was to do my nails (I have a diploma in acrylics, YES - IS THERE ANY SKILL I DON'T HAVE) and to watch the Hollyoaks omnibus on E4. Hannah's a big anorexic and is all obsessed, its ace! She's gone all spotty and dependent on her freaky friend. Great stuff. So, all seemed to go to plan for saturday, I'm typing with my talons right now. They're really porn, just like me.

Saturday night gareth and I watched Saw 2 and 3. For a while now I've been refusing to watch the Saw's as I thought they were horror which I can't stand. Horror is, making me jump for no reason, scary things that don't exist, like vampires and all that (except in Germany) and in general unneccesary blood and gore. HOWEVER, this was not what Saw was. Saw was a thriller and alothough a bit gory had a great story line so I would recommend this to one and all.

(Hey Loose women have a new set! Just watching it now in the background)

Sunday I went to see my Ma and Pa which was lovely as I haven't seen them for a good few weeks thanks to the ed fest, so that was lovely catching up and making them feel guilty for not coming to see Sandy Hole in ed. I gave cuddles to Timmy and Flugel too (my two cats) and asked if my mum had any Wonderwebb but she didn't.

The ultimate pleasure of the weekend happened when I embarked on my annual Cold Feet Marathon. I have the boxset of DVD's and I bloody love it. I drank some gin, smoked some fags and went to bed.

I've come to the conclusion I eat too much salt, I've just put TWO sachets on my Spag Bol which I obtained from the staff canteen. Should I be worried? I don't think so. Look at hamsters, they have a salt WHEEL!! Whats that about. They do random licks on it. Thats TOO MUCH SALT.

So, how am I feeling after the Edinburgh aftermath? I feel cool. I've booked the Hen and Chickens now for Catface Cabaret. Whats a space soon, for more details.

Have a great week.