31/03/08
Have you been to a Spring Harvester before? -
Categories: I am back from - for the first time ever - working at Butlins. I didn't have to wear a redcoat once, nor did I have to be pushed into the pool in a hilarious manner, nor was I woken by Ruth Madoc playing the glockenspiel. Although if I were her husband, I'd probably insist on it most mornings, just for the novelty value.
No, I was at Spring Harvest. If you're not of the Christian persuasion, you probably have an instant prejudicial impression of happy-clappiness. Actually even if you are of the Christian persuation, you probably have the same impression. Yes there was clapping, and yes there were happiness, but not a tambourine in sight, nor any sandals that I could see. The only guitars I saw were on stage in front several thousand people - none in chalets playing Kum-by-arr to six gathered-around teenagers sitting cross-legged.
Good, cliched expectations out the way, I can tell you it was an excellent week. I was doing a nightly resident's show there, which meant 5 hours of unique material, since people came back night after night. So it was a challenge, now working on my 4th Edinburgh hour, so I'd say I have at most 3 1/2 hours of jokes, and when you cut out the naughty stuff, it's embarrassingly little. But I'm delighted to say that, with much hard work, the time was filled with merry japes and tomfoolery, so it took more of a magazine show feel than a stand-up show. I hosted, introduced some silly videos from youtube, some bits of the past Edinburgh shows I've done (especially the one on Genesis, of course), and introduced some church-based spoof gameshows each night. As follows:-
- Tue: Darwin, Lose or Draw. Contestants compete to draw a biblical phrase, preferably one that Darwin wouldn't be happy about, to make it relevant to the title. Worked pretty well. But you try drawing Joseph & His Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat using only one colour.
- Wed: The Generations of Adam Game: Two teams of two watch an expert do something (the world record domino rally) and then try to recreate it (using Weetabix). Messy, but I loved it. Twas riotous. Oh, and then for the final conveyor belt round they had to memorise all the things I past from one Sainsburys bag to another. They walked away with a pack of raisins, a CD I wanted to get rid of, and a map of Butlins, among other (useless) things. A very fun night.
- Thu: Catchpharisee: Worked okay, but a few too many groans. But then I was posting pictures of, for example, Jesus with a broom in his hand ("Jesus swept"). I'll attach one at the bottom of this blog - see if you can guess it. Oh, and the final problem with this one was when a contestant called Mike fell off the stage quite nastily. Youch. We all thought he'd broken something. Thankfully he had not.
- Fri: Blind Curate: My favourite. A churchgoer without a church asks 3 vicars (behind a screen) questions to decide which church to go to. We had a Baptist minister, a Methodist minister and an Anglican vicar all vying for the attendance of Tasha. Such questions as "If your church worship were a holiday destination, where would it be?" gained such answers as "New Orleans. Cos we're culturally diverse, and if you come on the right week you might get immersed." The audience oooooohed at that one, I can tell you. I never wrote that one - that was the Baptist going off-script. She chose the Anglican, by the way.
- Sat: Church Family Fortunes: Another thoroughly enjoyable one. Two teams from two churches compete to guess what 100 churchgoers had answered to things like "Name something you're thankful for" (Facebook was no.1) or "Name a saint" (Bernard and Ivel were both there) or "Something you'd find in the Church News" (Top answer: Tony Maytum. No idea who he is, but I happened to ask a lot of people from St Paul's in Bournemouth, and this bloke Tony Maytum is always in their church news. No one guessed that one.)
That's more than enough about the show I was doing anyway. I hope to go back, and the feedback seemed to be good, so here's hoping I will be. I managed to make a few seminars and events, and the teaching was excellent. Jeff Lucas was a joy to listen to (his main message: too many Christians are looking to be offended, and we should have fun more often. Here here.), and I even bought a Limerick Bible (the Bible in limerick form). Throw in a couple of dips in the Splash water park, a walk on the beach, some excellent and lovely people that I met throughout the week, plus all the talks/worship/challenges you should have thrown at you at such an event, and it was great.
One of the big differences about going to an event like this, full of Christian types, is that people will help you without wanting anything in return, even recognition for it. So there are many unsung heroes. The kind and tactful steward who navigated a particularly eager audient away from me and the stage when I was setting up the show (thanks!), the bunch of guys from Bournemouth who bought me a Whopper when I didn't even ask for it, the couple from Bradford who come up and gave me a T-shirt on the last night for no real reason, the MD/conductor who came to the show every night and gave it his all, the Ipswichian steward who came over and shared lunch with me when I had nothing to do but read the paper... What good samaritans they all are.
Anyway, enough of the love-in. Now I'm back in the secular world, I'm sure some negativity will be waiting around the corner...
In the meantime, see if you can guess this biblical Catchphrase. Guesses welcome...
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