10/10/06
Badly judged sleep - badly judged posting -
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I've dropped a fairly major bollock.
Fell asleep at about 2.30pm today and have just woken up. Totally wide awake...well done me.
I've got an early start tomorrow for location filming so now I have the head fuck of trying to work out the best way of going about this. Do I stay up and see it through (as I am only on set for a few hours) or do I attempt to force myself to sleep knowing that this will most likely conclude with me tossing and turning for hours on end before rising in a stinkier mood than I would have been had I just stayed up?
My sleep is erratic at the best of times, and has become twice so in recent weeks as the medication I'm taking for that thing inspires very vivid, unsettling and unusal dreams. Today I dreampt about the journey from the house I stayed at in Edinburgh to the Pleasance Hut. In my dream I did this journey over and over again. There was no reason for me to keep making the journey, but I was locked in it. Another 'favourite' has been me dreaming that my laptop is broken and I have to work out a way of fixing it. I often wake and continue to try and work out the remedy for hours before having the epiphany moment where I realise it was just a dream. Anxiety dreams - can't beat them.
I watched Stephen Grant's dvd last night (the one of his live show), he sent it to me when he sent me the other dvd of the Stephen Fry depression programme that he didn't send me because that would be illegal unless he sent me his own copy of it which would technically fall into a loophole as long as I return it so yes that's it. I was really glad to see people rally around Stephen on the Chortle forums (which I never read of course) when someone had a pop at him the other week. If you didn't see it, some 'promoter' (who nobody appears to have heard of so I'm guessing they ran a gig at a pub once or something) said "That's the first time I've heard Stephen Grant be described as popular..." in reference to the description of his blog. He went on in further posts to say that Stephen was one of the few people in comedy (one of only three I think he said) that he would happily punch.
Now, here's what I think.
And please bear in mind that this is coming from someone who has learnt the hard way. It is very easy to throw mud when you are in the lower divisions of the comedy industry. The temptation to be outspoken is enormous in order to portray yourself as 'edgy' or 'maverick', but it is ultimately misguided. I know this because in the first couple of years I was in Big And Daft I fell into this trap myself, randomly slagging people off and playing the big "I am". It wasn't long until I regretted it, and started to be a bit more grown up about the whole thing. I found myself in Edinburgh 2001 apologising face-to-face to an act that I had been rude about in the press, and my apology was (at face value at least) accepted. Thing was, I stood by my opinion of them, but recognised that shouting my opinion (for that is all it was - my opinion as opposed to unarguable fact) in public was not only incredibly ungallant, but also reflected badly on me. Who the fuck was I to be spouting judgement? This is a difficult enough job as it is without us turning on each other.
This is why I have such a problem with a lot of the 'list' shows on TV. I find it so uncomfortable to watch relative unknown performers slagging off established people. It all feels a bit snidey to me. Yet, five years ago or so, I'd have been first in the queue to do it.
So, what I am saying is, I understand why somebody would go onto a forum and slag someone, but with benefit of experience, I also see how stupid it is to do so. Not least because Stephen Grant is one of few genuinely genuine folk in the world of comedy. The only problem I could envisage anybody having with Stephen is the belief that he is not what he portrays - that he is almost too good to be true. Thing is, he really is that way though.
Case in point, he said to me he would send me a copy of a programme I missed and wanted to see and then DID. I've lost count of the amount of times I've said to people I'd send them something and then not done, or people have said it to me, but he goes through with it. Not only that, he also encloses a copy of his live dvd and forewarns me that the other programme may be a bit heavy going at times. Added to all this the fact that he is a great comic, and for my money the very best compere in the comedy world, and you have even more reason not to be knocking him. He is to be treasured that lad. There is a reason that the audience at the Krater Comedy Club in Brighton sulk for the whole first section when I am announced as compere, and it's not because I'm rubbish, it's because Stephen Grant isn't there.
So that's what I think on the matter, and as my opinion is the only one that counts then I think we can safely say that this is now the matter resolved.
I'm at a bit of a loose end now. I'm still wide awake. Haven't even got any lines to learn as my days work tomorrow involves stalking a pretty petite French girl (in the sitcom I hasten to add). I suppose I could go out and do some real stalking as a 'rehearsal'...I'm sure that restraining order has run out now...
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