My gums are bleeding from sucking too hard on a sugar free sweet.
That's so anti-rock n roll.

I wish I had an Aunty Rocknroll. That would be a bit of a paradox though - because her name would be Rocknroll - which is quite Rocknroll. But then to her nieces and nephews she'd be Aunty / Anti Rocknroll - the nemesis of Rocknroll.
Perhaps she'd have to ensure that her siblings never had children, otherwise she might implode from name-based paradoxia.

Is paradoxia a word? If not, it is now.

That's one of the great things about Shakespeare (apart from, you know, him being the best playwright in history). He just said "Is that a word? Is that a phrase? No? Oh well, it is now!"
Although it's a shame that 'Sblood' never really caught on as an expression. Sounds a bit like a squashy alien.
"I am a Sblood! Cower before my undulating flesh!"

So, how are those Edinburgh shows going? I won't make it to the festival this year. It's a shame, but hey. Sometimes it's good to stay in London and while away the days on a diet of nairns oatcakes and sugar free sweets that make your mouth bleed. Nice.

In fact I'm busy making plans for Le Grand Wedding which will be happening next year. Yep, I'm getting married. It's a bit weird given that I don't really feel grown up enough to even tie my own shoelaces. Trying to work out what songs to have at the wedding. Nick and I both like that song about Dancing then wherever you may be, but apparently this isn't a very appropriate song for a wedding.
It's about a dancing cannibal isn't it?

Dance then wherever you may be
I am the lord of the dance said he
And I'll eat you all wherever you may be
And I'll eat you all at the dance said he.

And I don't much care for cannibals, but I sure do like dancing.

Ow, why does it hurt so much? No more sweets for me. I'm off to have some milk.

Yours,

Ruth P. Esquire