10/12/07
Liquid Swwwwwaaaaaards -
Categories: I have just returned home from seeing the GZA/Genius of Wu-Tang fame perform his entire groundbreaking album of 1995, 'Liquid Swords' (or as pronounced by many a Wu-Tang member 'Liquid Schwwwaaaaaards'). Sadly despite the fact that I have been looking forward to this since being 14 hip hop lovin' years of age, it has once again joined the ranks of gigs that don't quite live up to the self created hype.
There were several reasons for this, including the very poor sound, and the inability to see thanks to my vertically challenged height as well as the bad layout of the venue. The final straw was the main man GZA getting blindingly drunk and acting less like the hardcore member of one of the most influential hip-hop groups of the 90's and more like that weird tramp in the park who shouts at people and chases imaginary insects with his eyes.
But despite these things most people seemed to really enjoy the gig, except me. I begun to wonder if it is just my own high standards of expectation of how the gig should be, combined with my ever increasing inability to tolerate a lack of comfort. Looking back on gigs I haven't enjoyed of late this seems to be a common factor. Kanye West's performance in Edinburgh was spectacular, however the dickheads that were all around me, barging me and acting like Scotland invented rap were not. The Stones Throw gig in Camden was not the best set list I've ever seen a group do, but was it more to do with the fact my feet hurt and I was a bit tired? And true, the Beastie Boys set at Bestival was pretty shoddy, with none of the tracks anyone wanted to hear, but could my disappointment have been increased by the fact I couldn't really see anything due to the four men dressed as bananas right in front of me, and my knowledge that I would get little sleep due to the arseholes in the tent next to me who wanted to know 'where Dave was? And when is he coming back?' ( I was tempted after an hour of this stoned conversation to shout 'he's dead! I killed him because he kept f*cking talking'. But I didn't.)
Doing comedy, it takes the edge of my enjoyment of watching other comedians. Admittedly, there are still quite a few acts who I always enjoy watching, and would pay to see, but you know how they do what they do, because you do it too. (Re-reading that line, I realise that it sounds funny if sung in a Bing Crosby style. Try it, its great.) Music is not like that. Music still holds an air of mysticism for me. I am pretty much musically inept, and so watching someone play a great music gig is my escapism. I hold great respect for musicians and hence I am one of those irritating people at parties who when someone is attempting to engage me in conversation about music I will say I 'like everything' and proceed to talk to you about for hours, trapping you by the stairs when you just want another beer. I'm that into my music that it means it truly annoys me when a gig is bad.
I hope it isn't just because I'm getting old and grouchy, but I think I can justify the crapness of these aforementioned bad gigs because all of them could have avoided such high levels of mediocrity without too much difficulty. Well apart from the Kanye West show. The only solution to that would have been if everyone who bought tickets was fielded first and only specifically chosen people were allowed in. Unfortunately though but that's how fascism starts and I would prefer to stand next to a nob-end of a human being than for Nazis to run large music venues. In the case of the others though, all an audience deserves for the ticket price are these things:
1) The performer to want to be there. That's pretty key.
2) The performer to do the stuff people want to hear. Some new stuff is allowed, but what is not, is playing an hour of instrumentals instead of playing a single track anyone actually knows until the very end, and consequently boring 11,000 people. Beasties, are you paying attention?
3) The venue's sound to work. A simple sound check is all that is required to stop us thinking the acts are slurring (Bob Dylan is an exception) and the drum's aren't the only instrument (Drum 'n' Bass gigs are an exception).
4) Enough space in the venue for everyone to be able to breathe and maybe wiggle at least an elbow in an attempt to dance without decapitating the small beardy man next to them.
My three favourite gigs in the last 18 months have done all of these things as well as leaving long lasting memories of amazing music. At Radiohead in Edinburgh 2006, they played two and a half hours of all the tracks everyone wanted to hear, in an outdoor venue on a hot night as the sun was setting, a few minutes walk from where I was staying. Poifect and I was able to buy a t-shirt. At Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings at the Jazz Cafe earlier this year, the funk was so infectious that everyone was dancing. And I could see no matter where I stood. Bonus. And lastly, a few months ago, Joanna Newsom at the Royal Albert Hall. Her voice sent shivers down my spine and her songs were amazing, but also, I got to sit down for the duration.
I like to think of this not so much as fussiness, but more musical maturity. At least I hope that this is true. I dread to think that the day will come when I will only go to a live show if I can sit in an armchair in my pajamas, hovering above the stage, while the band plays the only three songs I like. Although saying that, it does sound very very good.
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