31/07/08
Flyering High -
Categories: Day one of flyering. I have quickly remembered how much of a facist I am about who does and doesn't receive flyers from me. I'm sure the idea is
to get bums on seats, and tickets bought, but here are a list of the people I will not give a flyer to:
Anyone with children - I am not a child hater, but our show is not for them or their parents. Or their parents friends.
Anyone who doesn't speak English - They wont understand the show. And I'm racist. No I'm not, but there is nothing worse than a crowd who doesnt
understand your show because they don't know the language. Except maybe a crowd who doesn't understand the show who do speak English. Or perhaps
a crowd of people who throw axes at you because they think you're racist.
Anyone really really old - Cant have people dying during the show. Or sleeping. But mostly dying.
Anyone who looks like they might punch me if I flyer them - Sometimes I risk it in the hope that it will brighten up their day. Other times, like today, I
realise they have arms wider then my head/ scary scary scars/ blood stains on their tshirt/ half a live bat in their mouth and I just know to steer clear of them
Anyone who has a company pass - You're safe. For now.
Anyone who is actually from Edinburgh - They hate us, they really really do. We've arrived in the city and made it a mess. We deserve the hate.
So if you are any of the above then well done, I will leave you alone. Otherwise I apologise for the shamless self whoring I will be doing from now till
the end of fringeness.
Other interesting points of today:
There is a puddle on Cowgate that you should not stand by. Today I did, wondering why there was such a large puddle in the road and how that would
probably cause a soaking. Curiosity as they say, soaked the Douieb. Not once, but twice. Luckily, some passers by saw it and laughed so much they took a flyer and
will now come to the show. Tragedy = comedy.
Saw the Real Daniel O'Donnell show tonight at the Pleasance. Damn good show and the best intro line I've heard in a while. Go see.
Tomorrow the shows begin and I have four to do in one day. I'm sure that while booking them all in it seemed like a great idea, however now it seems like it will be a day of hell. I may well die before week one is over.....
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